Renegades Give Teachers a Lesson

League rugby returned to National Stadium after a long Christmas break with Renegades taking on Teachers for the second time this season. The previous fixture was a close battle with the Renegades holding to win 20-17 after the Teachers came back from 17-0 down at half time.

It was perfect weather for a perfect game and there was a buzz around the ground. Renegades started strongly with forwards providing quick, clean ball at the breakdown for the backs to move the ball around. Good ball play in the middle led to an early opportunity for Jonah Kelly on the wing. Kelly ran it in from 30m and was handing them off like flies along the way. It wasn't long before Renegades were threatening the Teachers try line again, but it seemed they were keen for Kelly not to get another try. Sausage Cumbers and Mikey both got white line fever and chose to ignore the overlap only to get tackled short of the line. Frank the Tank eventually went over in the opposite corner to make it 12-0 after 10 minutes.

The next 20 minutes were as exciting as Chapter 36 of Dobbo's book, with the highlight being Jimmy Bum trying to score on the wrong line. Renegades butchered many chances by not getting the ball out wide, with Caballo Loco digging like a demented mole instead of taking advantage of a huge overlap.

Barry Archiballs went down injured after a tackle towards the end of the half and could've ended up in ward 4 (I hope not Bill...). He was resigned to sitting on the sideline shouting incoherently about butchers for the rest of the game. But any concerns about losing our fly half were soon put to bed, when Jimmy Bum crashed over for a try to make it 17-0.

The Teachers struck back with a try on stroke of half time to make it 17-7 and there was a sense of Deja-vu when they started the 2nd half strongly, looking dangerous in broken play. A tea break from deep inside their own 22 while Frank was off streaking through the quad, led to a length of the field try to make it 17-14.

With Archiballs off the pitch, it was up to Renegades most accurate kicker PK Skips to take over the kicking duties. He showed his pinpoint accuracy by knocking a penalty in off the post and then doing exactly the same thing 5 mins later after an interception try from Bum. However, when he missed his next kick, Captain Sausage soon realized that the little shit stirrer and been trying to deliberately miss all along and replaced him with any idiot who claimed he could kick. Bum's try brought up the bonus point and put a dent in the Teachers confidence.

Teachers took a further set back when they had a player red carded for popular no arms tackle on Jimmy Bum. Renegades then began to exert their dominance running in another 4 tries. Frank got his second try after an outrageous side step from Danny B. Kung Fu Pettler went in like a Sherman Tank to crash over for what is rumoured to be his first try for Renegades. They don't make them like that anymore (he won't like that, he's one of a kind). Frank had an opportunity for a hatrick, but chose to get smashed by the Teachers back row instead. However, as always when there are tries to be scored, Jimmy Bum was on the scene to get a hatrick of his own. A fourth try from Jimmy brought the score to 47-14 and ensured that we will have a few crates of the cheapest available beer for next week.

Despite the scoreline, the Teachers kept fighting to the end and threatened the Renegades try line in the dying minutes, but the defence held strong. The strong finish will give the Teachers confidence when the 2 sides meet again next week with plenty at stake. If the maths on this website is correct, which it probably isn't, then a Renegades win will guarantee them the league title. A win for the Teachers could throw the race wide open.

Earlier in the day saw the unfortunate end of the Ladies unbeaten run. With Coaches on baby watch and half the team MIA (presumed pregnant) after the Christmas break, it was up to many of the second team players to step up. Teachers started strong going 1-0 up in the first half but the Ladies battled on with some solid defending and Captain Mulli managed to even the game at 1-1 at the start of the second. Teachers continued to apply pressure and in the dying minutes snatched the ball from a wayward pass and crossed the line to make it 2-1 to finish. The Ladies, who remain top of the League, reassured their fans that they could only inflict marginal blame on temporary Coach Cumbers for the defeat.

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